Delivering the best man speech is a significant honour. The best man is responsible for engaging the wedding guests, celebrating the couple, and leaving a lasting impression.
Crafting and presenting this speech requires preparation, sincerity, and a touch of humour. Here’s a detailed guide on writing an impactful best-man speech.
Let’s get straight to the point.
Delivering a best man speech is an honour that requires preparation, structure, and heartfelt delivery. Start by gathering meaningful stories about the groom and the couple, then organise your speech into a clear structure: an engaging introduction, heartfelt anecdotes, and a warm toast.
Keep it concise (5–7 minutes), inclusive, and free of inside jokes or offensive humour. Practise beforehand, maintain eye contact, and manage nerves with deep breaths and a smile.
Avoid pitfalls like overly long speeches, neglecting the bride, or forgetting the toast. With sincerity and humour, your speech will leave a lasting impression and celebrate the couple’s special day.
The Key Steps To Writing A Best Man Speech
Writing a best man speech can be broken down into manageable steps. A structured approach ensures your speech flows smoothly and resonates with your audience.
1. Start With Preparation
Before you start writing, take some time to gather your thoughts and memories about the groom and the couple. Jot down notes on topics such as:
- How you met the groom.
- Memorable moments you’ve shared.
- How has the groom changed since meeting the bride?
- Funny yet appropriate anecdotes about the groom.
- Observations about the couple’s relationship.
The more material you gather, the easier it will be to structure your speech.
2. Plan Your Speech Structure
A clear structure will make your speech cohesive and easy to follow. A standard best man speech includes:
- Introduction: Briefly introduce yourself and your relationship with the groom.
- Middle: Share stories, highlight the groom’s qualities and reflect on the couple’s relationship.
- Conclusion: End with a heartfelt toast to the newlyweds.
3. Write A Memorable Introduction
Since not all the guests will know who you are, start with a quick introduction:
- Mention your name and connection to the groom.
- Use a light-hearted remark to grab attention. For example:
- “For those of you who don’t know me, I’m [Your Name], and I’ve had the privilege of knowing [Groom] for [number] years. I must say, I never thought I’d see him in a suit—let alone getting married!”
This sets a positive tone and puts the audience at ease.
4. Share Meaningful Stories
The heart of your speech lies in the stories you tell. Focus on:
- The Groom’s Personality: Highlight his qualities with humorous or touching examples.
- The Couple’s Relationship: Share anecdotes that reflect their love and compatibility.
- Light Humour: Keep jokes good-natured and avoid anything that could embarrass or upset anyone, especially the bride.
For instance:
“When [Groom] first told me about [Bride], he couldn’t stop smiling. I knew this was serious because he put his phone down for an entire conversation!”
5. Conclude With A Toast
The conclusion is your chance to leave a lasting impression. Your toast can include:
- A short blessing or wish for the couple.
- A quote about love or marriage (optional, but make it personal).
- A few heartfelt words tying everything together.
For example:
“Here’s to a lifetime of laughter, love, and happiness for [Bride] and [Groom]. May your days be filled with joy and your nights with shared dreams. Let’s raise a glass to the happy couple!”
Practical Tips For Delivering Your Speech
Writing a memorable wedding speech is only part of the equation. Delivering it effectively is equally crucial to leaving a lasting impression.
Below are some practical tips to ensure your performance resonates with the audience:
1. Understand Your Audience
Weddings often gather a mix of guests, from immediate family to distant relatives and friends. To ensure your speech connects with everyone, consider the diversity of your audience:
- Avoid making inside jokes that only a small group will understand. Instead, keep your humour light-hearted and inclusive.
- Avoid potentially controversial or inappropriate topics. Aim for clean, universal humour that appeals to all ages.
- Acknowledge both families. Even if your relationship is closer to the groom’s, include warm mentions of the bride and her family.
2. Keep It Brief
An ideal speech is between 5 and 7 minutes. This length strikes a perfect balance, allowing you to express your sentiments without overstaying your welcome.
- Staying concise ensures you retain the audience’s attention.
- Focus on meaningful anecdotes or heartfelt messages rather than lengthy storytelling. Remember, brevity often enhances the impact.
3. Practise Beforehand
Preparation is key to delivering your speech smoothly and confidently:
- Rehearse multiple times, preferably out loud, to familiarise yourself with the flow of your words. This helps you identify areas that might feel awkward or overly complicated.
- Practising in front of a trusted friend can provide valuable feedback. They point out areas to adjust for clarity, tone, or pacing.
- Use practice sessions to perfect your timing and ensure your speech stays within the recommended timeframe.
4. Maintain Eye Contact
Engaging with your audience helps create a connection and makes your speech feel more heartfelt:
- Instead of reading verbatim from a script, consider using bullet points or brief notes. This allows you to glance occasionally while still maintaining engagement.
- Look around the room as you speak. Eye contact conveys sincerity and helps draw the listeners into your narrative.
5. Control Your Nerves
Public speaking can be nerve-wracking, but managing anxiety ensures a more confident delivery:
- Take deep breaths before you begin. Slow, measured breathing helps calm the mind and reduce stress.
- Shift your focus from the crowd to the couple and your message. Visualising the joy on their faces can ease your tension.
- Start your speech with a warm smile. It sets a positive tone, reassures you, and creates an inviting atmosphere for the audience.
6. Avoid Over-Drinking
While enjoying the festivities is part of the celebration, moderation is essential:
- A celebratory drink may help ease your nerves, but too much alcohol before your speech can lead to slurred words or unintended remarks.
- After your speech, save the toasts and indulgences to ensure your delivery is polished and professional.
Focusing on these practical tips will help you confidently deliver a heartfelt speech that the couple and their guests will cherish.
Common Mistakes To Avoid
Even with the best intentions, certain missteps can diminish the impact of your wedding speech. Avoiding these common pitfalls ensures your speech is both memorable and well-received by the audience:
1. Overly Long Speeches
While enthusiasm is commendable, a lengthy speech can backfire:
- Aim to keep your speech within the 5–7 minute mark. Anything longer risks losing the audience’s attention and disrupting the flow of the event.
- Rambling or adding excessive details can make your speech feel tedious. Focus on meaningful anecdotes or heartfelt messages rather than trying to cover everything.
- Remember, the reception schedule is often tightly planned, and an extended speech can delay meals, dancing, or other activities.
2. Off-Colour Jokes
Humour can elevate a speech, but inappropriate jokes can ruin the mood:
- Steer clear of crude, offensive, or overly personal jokes. These can alienate guests or create discomfort.
- Avoid mentioning ex-partners, embarrassing stories, or topics that may offend the couple or their families.
- Instead, opt for light-hearted, universal humour. Playful anecdotes about the groom’s quirks or shared moments are often well-received and keep the atmosphere joyous.
3. Neglecting The Bride
While it’s natural to focus on the person you know best, overlooking the bride is a significant faux pas:
- Celebrate the couple as a unit. Share kind words about the bride, even if your connection is primarily with the groom.
- Highlight her qualities and her positive impact on your friend or family member. This will add depth to your speech and show respect for their partnership.
- Avoid making the speech entirely about the groom, as it can be one-sided or dismissive.
4. Forgetting To Toast
The toast is a traditional and integral part of any wedding speech:
- Skipping the toast can make your speech feel unfinished and disrupt the ceremony’s rhythm.
- After delivering your heartfelt words, end with a clear and enthusiastic toast to the couple’s future happiness.
- Practise your phrasing to ensure the toast is delivered smoothly and with confidence. Raising a glass and inviting everyone to join underscores the celebratory spirit of the occasion.
Conclusion
The best man speech is an opportunity to celebrate your relationship with the groom while honouring the couple’s special day.
With preparation, sincerity, and a touch of humour, you can create a speech that will be remembered fondly by everyone in the room. Follow these steps, avoid common pitfalls, and, most importantly, speak from the heart.
FAQs About Wedding Speech
What Kind Of Speech Does The Best Man Give?
The best man’s speech traditionally follows the groom’s speech. It’s a chance to say some sweet words about your relationship with the couple and wish your best pal well in his new marriage. But if the thought of giving a speech has your kneecaps sweating, relax.
How Do You Start A Wedding Speech?
Wedding Speech Opening Lines: Simple and Sincere Opening Lines. “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and thank you (name) for the kind introduction.” “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. As (name’s friend/relative), I’m delighted to welcome you all here tonight.”
What Are Best Man’s Responsibilities?
A best man’s duties include planning the bachelor party, making sure the groomsmen’s attire is ordered, organised and to the couple’s preferences, delivering an epic best man speech at the reception, being a model wedding guest (RSVP-ing on time, reserving travel and hotel with the room block early) and so, so much more.
Does The Best Man Have To Give A Gift?
Although you would think your presence is a gift enough, the best man should also typically get the groom a gift or organise a group gift from all the groomsmen to celebrate his wedding. We know, we know. This is another thing to add to your growing list of best man responsibilities.
Does The Best Man Toast The Bridesmaids?
The best man should also thank the groom for toasting the bridesmaids and comment on the newlyweds, especially the groom. He should also read out messages from absent friends and family and end with a final toast to the happy couple.
