Tips How to Write a Best Man Speech

Tips How to Write a Best Man Speech

If so, how comfortable are you with public speaking? At first glance, it may appear to be a simple task. Listen to a masterful orator on any subject, and you'll get the impression that the words just come out. However, hours of practice went into establishing that perfect delivery.

If you're going to be giving the best man speech, the importance of practising beforehand cannot be overstated. The guests at the wedding are counting on you to give a speech that not only expresses your sincere feelings about the union of the groom and his bride but also highlights your close relationship with the groom. But if you want your speech to resonate with the audience, you must also be engaging, informative, and genuine. Where can you even start to do such an impossible task?

It takes a lot of work to give a fantastic best man speech, but the first step is to write something funny, insightful, or both. This guide will offer you a starting point as you begin crafting an exceptional wedding-day address that you'll be proud to deliver, just as a well-crafted speech provides the foundation upon which you can build an audience-capturing performance. This article will discuss the five processes necessary for outstanding speechwriting and provide some useful hints along the way.

Table of Contents

FAQs About Weddings

The best man's speech traditionally follows the groom's speech, and it's a chance for you to say some sweet words about your relationship with the couple and wish your best pal well in his new marriage. But if the thought of giving a speech has your kneecaps sweating, relax.

Wedding Speech Opening Lines: Simple and Sincere Opening Lines. "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and thank you (name) for the kind introduction." "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. As (name's friend/relative), I'm delighted to welcome you all here tonight."

A best man's duties include planning the bachelor party, making sure the groomsmen attire is ordered, organized and to the couple's preferences, delivering an epic best man speech at the reception, being a model wedding guest (RSVP-ing on time, reserving travel and hotel with the room block early) and so, so much more.

lthough you would think your presence is gift enough, the best man should also typically get the groom a gift—or organize a group gift from all the groomsmen—to celebrate his wedding. We know, we know. Just another thing to add to your growing list of best man responsibilities.

The best man should also thank the groom for toasting the bridesmaids, and comment on the newlyweds, especially the groom. He should also read out any messages from absent friends and family, and end with a final toast to the happy couple.


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Steps to Write a Best Man Speech

It's go time; the clock is ticking. The best man's speech, like any other speech, may be written by following a systematic procedure. In specifically, there are five stages you should adhere to, the majority of which occur before you put paper (or keyboard) to paper (or fingers to keyboard, if you prefer).

  • First Things First: Before you sit down to write your speech, it's a good idea to jot down some notes about the bride and groom, such as how they met, what the groom was like before he met the bride, how he's changed for the better since knowing her, funny stories about the groom, how you know the groom and the bridegroom, and related topics.
  • Introduction: Since there will likely be people at the wedding that you have never met before, it's a good idea to introduce yourself and use a humorous opening remark to get people's attention. At this point, it's appropriate to crack a few jokes about the speaker's delivery.
  • You don't need to be a stand-up comedian to make people laugh and lighten the mood with a few well-placed jokes in your speech.
  • Remember to express your appreciation to the wedding party, including the maid of honour, best man, bride's father, and wedding guests.
  • In the middle, you'll want to reveal a personal detail about the bride and groom. Even if you have a closer relationship with the groom, make the speech about the happy couple as a whole. Here's where you can highlight the couple's best attributes, tell a hilarious anecdote, or express your admiration for the happy couple. If you want to do a full-on stand-up routine, keep things light and funny, and don't mention anything embarrassing about the groom. A winning stand-up act for a wedding should be encouraging and put the spotlight on the happy couple.
  • The conclusion of a great speech is just as important as the rest of it. It is customary for the best man at a wedding to offer a toast to the newlyweds during his speech. You could give a little blessing, a famous love quotation, or even just a few lines of congratulations and best wishes to the bride and groom in your toast. You should rehearse your toast until it sounds natural and not like you're reading it from a card.

Decide Your Purpose

The first step is to ask oneself, "Why am I giving this speech?" Reason number one is that the best man specifically requested it. You need to dig deeper to find the true meaning behind your speech.

A well-crafted speech has the potential to inspire its listeners to take action, persuade them to adopt a new viewpoint, or in this example, simply entertain them while imparting useful knowledge.

Your friend's future marriage will be the subject of your essay. To avoid boring your audience or turning your presentation into a long tirade, you should present it in a way that gets to the "core" of the topic. Although you won't be the focal point of the speech, you should still try to incorporate your insights into the groom's connection with his bride.

Make a theme statement that expresses your whole mission in one words. Or, "the day I learned my friend met his equal" or "the perfect love at the perfect time." If you follow this procedure, you'll have no trouble coming up with great material for your best man speech.

Determine Your Audience

The guests at the wedding will most likely be close friends and relatives of the groom and his bride, but who exactly will they be and how many will there be? The success of any speech hinges on the speaker's ability to connect with the audience by tailoring their words to their specific needs and interests.

Will it be a big party with many of people there, many of whom don't know each other? It could be best to avoid specifics and speak instead in broad strokes. With a more intimate group, you can break the fourth wall and share some more personal anecdotes than might be suitable in a larger group.

Do Your Research

Groomsmen speeches often include humorous anecdotes or a telling of a defining occasion in the groom's connection with his bride. While you might be able to get by with what you already know, you would be doing yourself a favour by completing some additional investigation.

You don't need to go deep (this isn't for the Pulitzer), but making sure you've got the fundamentals right by double-checking dates, places, names, etc. Research is almost never wasted effort since you almost always learn something useful, whether it's a few new facts that improve your speech or the realisation that there's a better viewpoint you can utilise to communicate your narrative.

Use other first-hand sources, such as the groom's friends and relatives, former roommates, and even a professor or job, if they are pertinent to your story. Use your personal memories of the events, along with the information you gather, to build up as comprehensive a foundation as you can for your speech.

Craft Your Outline

Do you recall making an outline before writing a paper in school? A best man speech outline should follow a similar format to that of a research paper or book report, although it doesn't have to be quite as extensive.

You should introduce your outline first. The next step is to use your mission statement from Step 1 to generate ideas for your narrative's body. Sprinkle the outline with the obligatory points (praising the bridesmaid, congratulating the couple, etc.) and wrap things up by calling for a toast.

Something like this is what you should aim for in your final product:

  • Start with an engaging introduction.
  • If you're going to speak, please introduce yourself and nod to the prior speakers.
  • Amuse your audience as you launch into your tale.
  • Share your most moving story with them.
  • Emphasize the affection the groom feels for the bride.
  • Be sure to include a complement to his companion.
  • Greetings to the happy couple!
  • Send another zinger on the groom's attire.
  • Stop talking and start the toast.

Create Your Speech

Now is the time of reckoning. Now is the time to start working on your best man speech. Stick to the 10-80-10 guideline and your plan as you develop your speech. Each part of your speech—the introduction and the conclusion—should take up no more than 10% of the total time allotted. The remaining 20% should be used to share your anecdotes, jokes, praise, appreciation, etc.

Keep your speech's narrative interesting as you write it to hold the attention of your listeners.

After you're satisfied with the script, read over the speech. Seek out and make a note of any egregious grammatical problems and text that doesn't make sense throughout proofreading. It's time to work on your delivery now. Remove any unnecessary details that distract from your argument. If anything doesn't seem right, fix it or take it out. In the end, you want to have complete faith in what you're presenting.

Dos and Don’ts


  • Prepare in advance by taking notes (we have some great notecards; a best man should always look the part)
  • Before including anything that could cause tension, discuss it with someone else (the groom included) or leave it out entirely.
  • Practice! Run through as many drills as possible, either alone yourself or in front of an audience. Talk to the point, plainly, and loudly.
  • Relish it and relax; the spectators will side with you.
  • Keep It Simple and Short.


  • Just act weird. It's important to keep the wedding party happy, but you should also consider the other guests.
    Don't try to make everyone laugh by sharing inside jokes that only you and the groom will get.
    Do things on the fly. If you really want to get the most out of it, preparation is essential. Who among us wants to give a speech in front of a hundred people without having practised it?
    Waffle. Remember that there will be other speeches and that the wedding day itself will last a long time, so try to limit yours to no more than 10 minutes.

The Ultimate Guide to the Best Man's Speech

Here's some advice on how to wow an audience with the best man's speech:

Think Ahead.

An effective speech requires planning, regardless of how well the speaker can speak spontaneously. Not something you should do behind a table napkin. Some planning is required to deliver an effective speech. Finding the time during the quiet is especially important given all the other things you'll be doing. The suggested time frame is 90 days prior to the wedding. Instead of trying to think of anything on the go, give it some time to simmer and give your imagination some room to work. When giving a great speech, it's best to plan ahead and not rely on spontaneity, despite the fact that this trait might have its advantages.

Make a Killer Speech “The First Impression.”

In just a few sentences, the author established the tone. It will pique people's interest and kick things off on the right foot. Try to keep the crowd together. Most people won't expect a truly outstanding speech, so you should start strong. Start off strong, whether with a one-liner or a roast.


Find the one compelling anecdote that connects everything and play it up. You need to tug at their heartstrings to persuade people to slap their knees. That anecdote which wonderfully illustrates your groom and which, preferably, also highlights your bond with him. People of all ages enjoy great stories.


Please don't try too hard or act like you're reading from a script. You can run into trouble if you try to do too much ahead of time. What you seek is pure. What you say should come from a place of "felt," rather than rote memorisation.


One of the best ways to endear yourself to others is to poke fun at yourself occasionally. You may let the groom appear even better by taking a few shots of yourself first. Boost his confidence; it's his special day after all! The bride's and groom's relatives who don't know each other well will be in the audience; therefore, it is important that the bride and groom find you to be likeable and an excellent portrayal of the groom.

Determine the Ideal Timing.

Avoid wasting anyone's time by being as brief as possible. They can feel hungry or bored if you make them wait too long. We've found that five minutes is about right, leaving you craving for more but not forcing you to rush through anything.

Don't Go Crazy With the Roasting, and By All Means, Do not Make Fun of The Bride-to-Be!

However close you may be to her, this is her special day, and women have a tendency to romanticise such occasions. Don't bother telling the crowd about how she gained 15 pounds in her first year of college; they won't think it funny. Keep the roast to the groom only, and take it easy if you must.

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Get Some Practise In, Preferably in Front of an Appreciative Crowd.

No amount of repetition in front of a mirror can replace actual practice in front of an audience. The difficulty lies in making your point across and having 200 pairs of eyes on you.

Or Just Write It Down and Picture Yourself Giving the Speech.

Most people are unaware that writing things down improves memory. If short-term memory loss does occur, you'll have your handy guide to rely on for solace.

Maintain Energy and Clarity.

Body language and tone are said to account for 90% of all communication. Use your feet, take charge of the room, and create dynamic range in your voice by going from low to high pitches. Diversify your delivery and perfect your enunciation if you want to hold your listeners' attention. A snivelling individual is not someone who draws many people. Speeches that drag on for too long are difficult to summarise, so make sure to pace yourself.

Limit Yourself to Just One Drink.

You may believe that doing so may calm your nerves, but in reality, it will undermine your performance's credibility. Slurred speech is the ultimate indicator of emotional distress.

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