You are getting married, huh? Congratulations! I am very happy for you. But what you don’t realise is that you are about to spend the next year or so of your life planning a wedding with your significant other.
Assuming you go the traditional route of a large wedding, you are going to spend every waking moment of the next few months of your life scouring over wedding venues and sampling cakes.
I spent an entire Saturday afternoon before my wedding looking at chair covers. You’d be surprised how many chair covers there are and how many features they have. There are enough options to ruin your Saturday afternoon, that’s for sure. But, the one bright and shining star in a long list of dreadful planning events and discussions over table centrepieces is planning your bachelor party. We have an exclusive range of hens ideas Melbourne to help you with your entertainment needs.
If one was to make a calendar of events leading up to the day you tie the knot, the bachelor party should be highlighted, circled in red, and written in the most permanent of markers you can find.
The bachelor party is not without its stressors. One of those stressors is deciding who to invite and coming up with the bachelor party guest list. Usually, guys stay out of the drama but go ahead and neglect to ask someone who thought they should have been on the bachelor party guest list. You are for sure, going to be the recipient of a relatively passive-aggressive Facebook comment.
So spend a few minutes and put together a bachelor party guest list. Fortunately for you, we have narrowed that list into this very easy to use guide. Use this guide to your advantage. Scroll through your contacts and place people into the following categories.
Table of Contents
- 1 What Is a Bachelor Party?
- 2 Who Throws The Bachelor Party?
- 3 Who Should You Invite to a Bachelor Party?
- 4 Who Should You NOT Invite to a Bachelor Party?
- 5 Who Pays for The Bachelor Party?
- 6 Budgeting Tips for Bachelor Parties
- 7 What Do You Do at a Bachelor Party?
- 8 Creative Bachelor Party Ideas
What Is a Bachelor Party?
A bachelor party is a familiar pre-wedding ritual that honours the groom as he celebrates his “last night(s)” as a single man with his closest buddies. Traditionally a group of close male friends throw the bachelor party in the groom’s honour.
A bachelor party typically lasts for an entire weekend, but may also just be a single day or evening. It occurs either near the groom’s home or at a specially chosen destination. Typical bachelor parties involve at least one (or a few) excellent meals at restaurants, drinking and bar hopping, and some daytime activities like playing or watching live sports, hiking or fishing, or hanging by the beach or pool.
Who Throws The Bachelor Party?
While traditionally the groom’s wedding party—the man of honour and groomsmen—throw the bachelor party, really anyone close to the groom can plan it. If the groom has chosen not to have a wedding party, or if it’s not ideal or possible for the best man to handle this responsibility, the following people would be good candidates:
- a sibling of the groom
- a close cousin of the groom
- a group of the groom’s long-time coworkers
- a dear childhood friend of the groom
Organising a large group of guys to make travel plans, book hotel rooms, and maneuver in and out of public spaces for a weekend takes special skills. Not every friend or relation will be the ideal person to plan a bachelor party. Here are some questions you should ask when deciding if your best man, groomsman, or other buddy or relative should throw the bachelor party:
- Is he close enough to the groom to know what he will want from his bachelor party experience?
- Is good at handling logistics, making reservations, and organising groups of people?
- Does he have good communication skills?
- Can he keep track of costs to make sure expenses are appropriately settled up during or after the party is over?
Who Should You Invite to a Bachelor Party?
The invite list for a bachelor party is pretty much up to the groom. He should make a list of names and contact information for everyone he’d like to include in his special day or weekend, and hand it off to the bachelor party organiser (s) to send out an invitation. If the party organisers feel like being fancy, an online invitation is generally formal enough for a casual event like a bachelor party. A group email also works instead of traditional invitations. Check out the range of Magic Men’s Melbourne hens ideas to help in your party planning.
While most bachelor parties are all-male gatherings, there’s no hard-and-fast rule that says women can’t be invited to a groom’s weekend of honour. It’s his weekend, so if he is incredibly close to his sister or a few female friends and wants them present, go with it. It might change the group dynamic or itinerary slightly, but follow the groom’s wishes.
In general, the list of bachelor party invitees will include some or all of the following people:
- The best man
- The groomsmen
- Other close friends of the groom
- Siblings, soon-to-be-siblings, or same-age relatives of the groom
- Close co-workers of the groom who will also be invited to the wedding
Who Should You NOT Invite to a Bachelor Party?
There are only two major rules of thumb when determining who should not be put on the invitation list for a bachelor party:
- Anyone who would make the groom feel uncomfortable: As this celebration is all about the groom, make sure that everyone who’s invited is someone who feels comfortable being himself (in various states) around. People like the groom’s father (or even the bride’s father), his more senior relatives, former coaches or teachers, or any buddies with whom he’s had tension or difficult relations might not be the right candidates.
- Anyone who’s not also invited to the wedding: It’s a standard rule of etiquette for all pre-wedding festivities that invitations should only be sent to people who will also make the guestlist for the wedding itself. Otherwise, a very awkward and uncomfortable situation may arise.
The Argument Against Inviting The Dads To The Bachelor Party
Some people will tell you that it’s traditional to invite the bride’s father to the bachelor party—and that failing to so will be a big insult to the bride. We say no. It is not a tradition. You don’t have to invite the bride’s father. We don’t think you should.
We don’t think you should invite the bride’s father, your father, the bride’s brother, your brother, any of your uncles or her uncles, your business associates, your lawyer, your accountant, or the guy who cleans your gutters unless you want to—in which case you absolutely should (especially the gutter guy, who doesn’t get out enough).
You should only extend an invitation to those people you want to be there because the whole point of a bachelor party is for you to relax and have fun with your friends. Later on, there will be plenty of opportunities for you to stress what your father-in-law is thinking, or get embarrassed by something your dad does.
The most obvious reason you don’t want either of your dads is that sex will be involved. Not actual intercourse or anything (we assume), but the idea of sex. Whether you drop a bundle at a traditional strip club, hire some dancers for a private show, throw a Brazzers video marathon, or even just go to a bar and talk about girls, sex will be in the air.
This sets up several unedifying scenarios:
- You get to see your future father-in-law motorboating a 22-year old stripper’s breasts;
- You get to see your father staring, watery-eyed, at a closeup of a porn star’s o-face;
- Both of them get to hear about that time you had sex with two girls, on molly, in an empty lecture room of your college’s science building;
- You get to hear one (or both) of them brag about all the disco chicks they screwed back in the 1970s.
- Some things can’t be unseen, some stories that can’t be unheard.
Drugs, Alcohol or Both.
While we don’t recommend over-drinking during your bachelor party, you’re probably going to want to drink something: beer at least, or single malt scotch, or fancy cocktails with names like Roasted Cherry Bourbon Smash or Death in the Afternoon. You might also want to light up a joint, take a few bong hits or pop various chemicals.
Even if your father and father-in-law are cool with that, do you want to have them around? Part of the initial thrill of smoking pot, for instance, was the danger of your dad catching you. As for your father-in-law, you probably should assume that anything he sees will get back to his daughter, one way or another.
Worse, the elder folks may see this as an opportunity to relive the excesses of their youth, which will put you in the position of having to take care of them. Do you want to watch your father-in-law vomiting Negronis in the men’s room stall, or have to deal with your dad stripping to his undershirt and doing the Tootsie Roll in the middle of the dance floor?
Rock n’ Roll
This last one may seem minor, but it could slow your bachelor party roll. When the sound system is blasting, you want everyone to be in sync and enjoying themselves. That’s just never going to happen when you have people from an older generation there. It’s not their fault; they only grew up with a different set of tunes. So, even if they pretend to like the Spotify mix, your best man put together—which is heavy on, say, Jay-Z, Kendrick and The Weeknd—you know they’re just tolerating it.
Our advice is to take them out for a guy’s dinner, where you can engage in manly banter without getting too far into difficult topics.
If you feel you have to invite them, here’s hoping they have the good sense to decline politely. They’re mature, reasonable people, after all. Maybe they’ll take one look at the invite and say “I’m too old for this shit.”
You love your dad, and maybe even your father-in-law. But that doesn’t mean you should have them at your bachelor party, mainly if it will prevent you from really cutting loose.
Who Pays for The Bachelor Party?
The guys who plan and attend the bachelor party—that is, everyone except the groom—typically share thee night or weekend costs. The groom is generally treated to this revelry (or debauchery?) as a gift from his closest buds, covering his portion of the expenses and splitting them among the group.
The only exception to this practice of “Groom goes free” is if the bachelor party is held at a far-off or expensive destination. If the decision is made to take the bachelor party to Europe or the Caribbean, the groom might want to pay for his travel or chip in for the hotel or Airbnb rental. Suppose it’s important to him to have a luxe or exotic experience for his bachelor party. In that case, it’s a nice gesture to offer to defray the costs of that wish for his friends who want to participate but don’t have unlimited budgets.
Budgeting Tips for Bachelor Parties
The money portion of bachelor parties can get sticky. When spirits are flying high (in more ways than one), it’s easy to throw budgetary caution to the wind: another round of shots! Let’s order the prime rib! The entrance fee to that club is worth it! Then, when the final tallies have been added up in the harsh light of day, and everyone is told what they owe, shock and dismay may set in.
To prevent sticker shock at the end of the weekend, and to make sure everyone who attends is comfortable with the anticipated costs, follow these best practices when talking money about bachelor parties.
- The party planner(s) should do a some quick guesstimating ahead of time—like when invitations are sent, or early as plans are being formed—and provide a rough estimate for how much each dude will need to contribute financially for the weekend. This will help guys on tighter budgets make informed, wise decisions about whether or not they can attend.
- Pick a few big-ticket splurges that everyone can agree on ahead of time, such as tickets to a pro sports game, a private yacht cruise for the day, or a fully loaded rental home. Then let folks choose their level of spending for smaller things, like breakfasts and drink orders. This will allow budget-minded guys to select cheaper options wherever it doesn’t impact the group’s activities.
- Pick one responsible point person to be in charge of tracking the group’s shared expenses. Have him use an expense-tracking and money-sharing app, like Splitwise, to make it super easy to keep tabs on how money has been spent and who owes whom what.
- For some easy savings, look for off-season options when picking the date of the bachelor party. September can still offer beautiful beach weather, but house rentals will be considerably cheaper after the peak season.
- Likewise, look for cost savings in your choice of accommodations. Maybe you can stay at someone’s vacation condo or weekend cabin to save money. If you’re headed to a big city, stay somewhere that’s within walking distance of downtown to save money on transportation.
What Do You Do at a Bachelor Party?
Every bachelor party will be a little bit different, just like every groom himself. In general, the bachelor party should reflect the groom’s interests and personality. If music is his passion, try to organise the bachelor party around seeing live musical acts or, if there are musicians among his crew, devoting time to jamming late into the night. If he’s an outdoorsy guy, a bachelor party at a cabin in the woods, complete with hiking, fishing, and bonfire bonding, would be an ideal scenario.Tired of looking for hens party ideas? Look no further, Magic Men has you covered.
Here are a few essential pointers on what most bachelor parties involve, to give you a general sense of what to expect:
- Drinking: At home, in bars, at clubs, pretty much when and wherever… bachelor parties typically involve a decent amount of alcohol consumption.
- Fun daytime activities: Think of watching live sports, guided eating or drinking tours, visiting museums and cultural institutions, doing something physical like hiking, biking, surfing, or just chilling on the beach.
- Nice dinners out Steakhouses are popular choices, but anything that suits the groom’s appetite (sushi, pizza, burgers, Mexican, Italian, seafood, etc.) goes.
- Nightclubs: From standard nightclubs with DJs, dancing, and bottle service to adults-only entertainment, most bachelor parties wind up at some form of the club for late-night revelry.
Creative Bachelor Party Ideas
If you’re the brains behind your buddy’s bachelor party, you can’t go wrong with a classic evening of good food, healthy drinks, and great friends just hanging out and celebrating the groom. But if you’re looking to take things up a notch—or if your groom isn’t into the standard bachelor party protocol—check out some of our creative bachelor party ideas below:
- Go to a concert or music festival.
- Rent a cabin in the woods
- Take a road trip on Route 66
- Fly fishing
- Do a backyard pig roast.
- Go hiking or backpacking
- Learn to surf
- Attend a monster truck rally
- Float down a river in inner tubes
- Visit a national park.
- Rent a ski cabin and hit the slopes
- Get tickets to a pro wrestling or boxing match.
- Rent an RV and go car camping
- Practice shooting at a rifle club or skeet range
- Go golfing
- Compete on an obstacle course (bonus if it involves mud)
- Play paintball or laser tag
- Schedule a guided white water rafting trip
- Learn a hands-on skill, like woodworking
- Access your inner child by going to batting cages and playing arcade games
- Attend a food or wine festival
- Rent ATVs and go off-roading